"I'm MORMON"

So....since I can't seem to find anything exciting right now to post, I have decided to tell you a story about my past---it is not great but I hope you can at least get a laugh out of it!


Once upon at time there was a young teenager living in southern California named Winnie. Winnie was a happy, friendly, fun loving girl.....and yet incredibly naive! She really enjoyed doing things for others and welcomed opportunities to serve.
One day, Winnie was asked to take lunch to the missionaries. She was excited to have this opportunity and carefully packed an amazing lunch in a large red cooler. Once the cooler was carefully placed in the back seat of her car she set off to feed the missionaries.
Upon arrival to the missionaries’ apartment, Winnie emptied the contents of the cooler in the kitchen and then immediately said her goodbyes (that is a whole different story—yikes) and immediately got into her 1976 (I think) blue Chevy Nova (8 cylinders--I might add) and started for home. Unfortunately, Winnie was not familiar with the area in which the missionaries resided, so she quickly became lost on the freeway. As her stomach started to turn and the fear of finding herself in East LA increased, she saw a sign that she thought was her exit. Panic struck, Winnie quickly crossed all 4 lanes of traffic to try and catch the off ramp. Once she had successfully crossed all 4 lanes of traffic she decided that it wasn't the exit she was looking for and then immediately crossed back over 2 lanes before she decided that maybe she was wrong and should take that particular off ramp (you know it is said that girls are allowed to change their minds....right). Winnie then proceeded to cross back over the 2 lanes she had just crossed to exit the freeway.
Unbeknownst to Winnie, as she was crossing these lanes, there was a cop driving directly behind her. This cop did not feel that Winnie was driving safely and decided to pull her over. Winnie pulled over on the side of the off ramp and waited for the cop. Her heart was pounding a mile a minute! "Can I see your drivers license please," asked the cop. Winnie quickly located her license and handed it over to the officer. Winnie's heart sunk. She knew she was going to be in big trouble when she got home! As the cop surveyed Winnie's license and returned to his vehicle he noticed the big red cooler in the back seat. When he returned to Winnie's car he asked, "Have you been drinking?" Immediately Winnie's fear turned to rage...."How dare he," she thought and turned to the cop stating quite firmly, "I AAAAAAMMMMMM MORMON, I DO NOT DRINK!" She could not have been more forceful or offended and the look of disgust on her face proved it. This reaction must have been a first for the befuddled cop because he quickly returned the drivers license and weakly reminded Winnie to drive more carefully.
Of course Winnie, at that time was completely offended....but years later as she looked back on the situation she can only laugh out loud. Poor cop, he thinks he sees a drunk swerving in and out of traffic only to be lectured by this "drunk" that she is Mormon and would never drink....the funniest part of the whole story is that he doesn't even bother to ask Winnie to open the cooler!!!
Confessions by Winnie